The Thirst: The Hunger Games Edition

Lionsgate is considering creating a “Hunger Games” theme park.  A theme park? Seriously?william shatner wtfShould we also consider opening a “Lord of the Flies” theme park or what about the Attic of Anne Frank Park or a Hotel Rwanda Resort? “Oh, that sounds like a GREAT idea” says NOBODY!  Why? Because it is scary! Ain’t nobody about celebrating cruelty of mankind.

I am a fan of “The Hunger Games”.  I loved the books, I loved the first movie, I loved Jennifer Lawrence as Katniss, I just loved it!

For those of you who aren’t familiar with “The Hunger Games”, it is a dystopian (opposite of utopian) novel that takes place in post apocalyptic Panem.  The Hunger Games is an annual event in which 2 kids from every district are randomly selected to battle each other to death.  It’s the ancient Rome version of the Olympics.  The last kid standing is the winner (and the only kid alive.)  Pretty depressing stuff.

Not depressing like Scandal spoilers depressing but depressing like kids dying depressing.  Not even like kids dying but kids being murdered, straight up assassinated depressing.

So imagine asking your kids “Hey you wanna go to Disney, Six Flags, Lego Land or to the Hunger Games?”  I already know the young version of myself would not be about the Hunger Games life.

what you talkin bout

I’d be all about the House of Mouse, at least I know he ain’t out tryna kill me.  Like where is the fun in fleeing for your life?

Please don’t give me but “The Hunger Games” is fictional crap because it still doesn’t make it less scary.  Those kids had to be skilled with swords, bows and arrows, fight for scraps of food only to die at the end…what part of that says Theme Park to you?

tina fey idk

Am I overlooking the obvious here?  Is there a market for this kind of stuff?  Perhaps this theme park would be used a some sort of alternative punishment that parents and schools could use to discipline their children? I’m really trying to understand this.  Lionsgate may just be trying to see how many ridiculous ways they can squeeze money out of this franchise and that is just plain thirsty!

I can keep going on these bad movie inspired theme parks.  Just in time for the holidays we have Schindler’s Christmas List!

snow white hi 5

No? Too far? *Kanye Shrug*

Tagged with: Hunger Games, Theme Parks, Corporate Greed, hollywood, dystopia, bad idea