So in my new fabulous unpaid Hollywood job as an Executive Assistant working for a not so known production company for a B-list celebrity, I realized that Los Angeles may indeed be the city of Angels. In my hypothesis I will even suggest that the angels in this city are fallen Angels where dark forces carry out the mission for the Son of the Morning and I was hired by the Lucifer himself!
The job itself was not stressful, remember this company was way small, so the majority of my work was answering phones and reading scripts. The job, when the Devil was out of the office was somewhat pleasant. Unfortunately there was more Hellish days than pleasant ones. I worked in the office with three other interns. All who dealt with the heat in various ways.
On the way to the office I would listen to soothing music, ranging from Enya to Hillsong. One of my fellow interns would roll a joint and blow away her anxiety. Others would pray to their perspective gods. No matter what we did, we would still get yelled at, asked to pull long hours, &get criticized…all for no pay!
One time when Beezlebub called the office and one of the interns answered the phone and then the call was transferred to me. He told me that her voice was ”too black” and he wanted someone “less ghetto and more professional” to answer the phone. Maybe he could get away with saying those things because he too is black but I’m pretty sure in a major studio the girl (who by the way wasn’t ghetto at all) could have gone to HR with a serious discrimination complaint.
Another time Satan stormed in demanding that I get so in so’s agent on the phone. I got as far as the assistant…apparently this was not good enough. Even though the agent was in a meeting he felt that the he should still be able to get through. None of my negotiating skills was sharp enough to penetrate the agents assistant. So my boss let me know that I didn’t have what it take to make it in the industry. As far as I remember he standing beside me and was unable to get the agent on the phone either…somehow he is doing okay.
One time I didn’t have his smoothie back to his office “on time” meaning that although I had to walk a couple of blocks, wait in line, wait for the smoothie to be made, and walk another of couple of blocks…he wanted his smoothie in 3 mins not 5…so I got yelled at. Oh and a classic one was when I answered the phone and the person asked if they could speak to the Devil, I asked “may I ask who’s calling?” Once I transfer the call, he told me never to ask his girlfriend who she is, just put the call through.
Are you effin kidding me?
Am I effin kidding?
These are real stories. I’ve seen interns get fired on the spot. I’ve heard one intern get told she wasnt stylish enough. At that point I wanted to remind them that our salary of nothing made it kind of difficult to go on shopping sprees at Nordstrom Rack let alone Nordstrom!
At the end of my three months, none of my fellow interns, all who started after me were working at the production company. And I was told that my work and my work ethic was great, however the company could not afford to pay me for another couple of months.
I’m willing to do free labor to get my foot in the door but I’m never willing to be used. So that day I quit.